Confusion...

Have you ever thought you knew everything about someone and then they do something that totally shakes the foundation of everything you "thought" you  knew? Yea, that happened to me recently...My first reaction when I learned of this (we'll call it the "event") "event" was a healthy dose of denial, denial denial denial! Then when I found out it was true, I was shocked, confused, but most of all hurt. I think hurt was the #1 reaction to the "event". (Please don't ask me to elaborate on what the "event" was, because I won't, I come here to vent not explain, thanks) I'm still sifting through my emotions and trying to decide exactly where I stand. I don't know...If hurt is #1 then confused is definitely #2. I've never been so confused about how I feel on an issue like this. But was confuses me the most is out of all the denial, hurt, shock, and confusion, the one thing I haven't felt is anger. And that REALLY confuses me. If you know me at all you might know I have a bit of a temper. So my complete lack of anger has me at a loss as to what to do next. Any other time I'd yell and get mad and work out my anger and the problem all at the same time. But this time I just can't get up a head of steam...I hate feeling like this. Betrayal has just popped into my head. That makes sense, betrayal explains what I've been feeling I think. I don't know how to get past this, it's like being stuck in a rut and you don't have 4 wheel drive, or being adrift on the water and your motor conked out. Silly metaphors I know, but I don't know how else to describe this ache behind my heart. Maybe I'll figure it out, if I do I'll let you know *ABS*